


i've never heard of a 'first year' in my entire life

by queerbaitings



Series: i'm suffering™ [4]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, F/F, Help, M/M, chat fic, first years are now second years, idk yet, karasuno-centric, second years are now third years, so many rarepairs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-07
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-01-08 08:25:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 10,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12250653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queerbaitings/pseuds/queerbaitings
Summary: yama: fuck the first yearssun: i mean i'd rather fuck a specific third year but u do u[ aka i start a new chatfic that was only meant to involve the first year-turned-second year karasuno kids, but the now-third years got involved too ]





	1. what's a first year??

**Author's Note:**

> lies i told on the last chapter of pcc:  
> \- this would be out the day after it ended  
> \- it would be a now-second years chat
> 
> i honestly cba to make this a 100% stand-alone so either be confused or read my other mess of a chat fic

**sun** _has named the chat_ **“second years!”**

yachi: oo reviving the chat

sun: keep it living

yachi: y e a h

yama: it’s weird having these usernames again

sun: change ur name back to gomen then

yama: why match names w tsukki when we’re not dating

sun: i

sun: not again

yama: dw it was gradual we realised we don’t work as well as we used to

sun: you’re so chill about this

yama: no point in stressing

sun: how long has it been?

yama: we broke up during the first week of break

sun: well holy hell

sun: is tsukishima gonna be inactive in this chat now

tsukishima: you bet your fucking ass i am

blueberry milk: you just spoke

tsukishima: okay well how about you shut up

blueberry milk: no

yama: tsukki no

tsukishima: ?

yama: my tsukki senses were tingling

yachi: oh? ;)

yama: no

yachi: my mistake i didn't read all the messages

sun: gdi yachi

yachi:  _we all make mistakes, hinata_

yachi: btw where have u been?

sun: i had a gay awakening

blueberry milk: ...didn't you have your gay awakening when you met nishinoya-san?

sun: well

sun: ur not wrong

sun: but i just realised exactly  _how_ gay for him i am

yama: do we wanna know?

sun: probably not

yama: okay then

tsukishima: oh great we still have to hear about your relationship even though he's not here

sun: yep!

sun: and it'll be worse because yachi AND i have partners who aren't in this chat ;)

sun: and i'll keep bugging u guys when i miss him

tsukishima: it's a no from me

 **tsukishima** _has added_ **noyaoyaoya** _to the conversation_

tsukishima: now be disgusting together and don't annoy me when you miss him

 **tsukishima** _has gone offline_

noyaoyaoya: but i'm not a second year anymore?

yachi: you're stuck here now, though

yama: i have an idea!

 **yama** _has added_   **ennoshita** _and_   **tanaka**   _to the conversation_

 **yama** _has renamed the conversation_ **"karasuno!"**

sun: but the first years..?

yama: fuck the first years

sun: i mean i'd rather fuck a specific third year but u do u

yama: HINATA

sun: IT'S THE TRUTH

yama: u know what i meant!

sun: i do

 **sun** _has renamed the conversation_ **"what's a first year?"**

yachi: idk hinata what's a first year

sun: oh golly,, help me out here yuu

noyaoyaoya: hmm, can't say i've ever heard of a first year before

yama: i swear i've heard it before, but i can't quite put my finger on it...

blueberry milk: we were literally first years last year wh

tanaka: dang, kageyama ruined the joke!

sun: TANAKA SAN YOU'RE HERE

tanaka: I SURE AM

noyaoyaoya: why are you more excited to see him than you were to see me

sun: yuu we are  _literally_ sitting right next to each other stop

noyaoyaoya: >:(

tanaka: yoo somebody's jealous (;

noyaoyaoya: shut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> awkward ending but anyway
> 
> 1\. i purposely didn't add kinoshita and narita sue me  
> 2\. i added the third years so i can get more noyahina fluff happening  
> 3\. if you've read pcc, i didn't make tsukkiyama canon in this fic bc i don't ship it anymore  
> 4\. i/will/ make tanaka and ennoshita actually have lines in this fic i swear


	2. “shiut up”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i only write because my otp tags are empty rip
> 
> read chapter 19 of pcc to be less confused but honestly it doesn’t matter

sun: u know what i understand why yuu and tanaka like being called senpai so much

yama: did one of the first years call you senpai today?

sun: yep!

blueberry milk: i don’t want to know your kinks

sun: s t o p

noyaoyaoya: i don’t have a senpai kink!

blueberry milk: i wasn’t talking about you

noyaoyaoya: ...well fuck

yama: HAHAHA

noyaoyaoya: shut up

yama: sorry lol

sun: “tsukki” doesn’t exist anymore

sun: there’s only “lol”

tuskishima: shut your damn mouth

sun: there he is!

tsukishima:  _shut your damn mouth_

noyaoyaoya: that’s a little rude :/

tsukishima: you’re a little

noyaoyaoya: hey now, that was A LOT rude ://

sun: it’s okay yuu you’re big enough for me

blueberry milk: stop talking about your sex life

sun: okay the first time was u imagining things and now i’m only telling he’s tall enough for me

sun: stop it u filth

yachi: disgusting

blueberry milk: you’re wrong

blueberry milk: if you scroll to the top of this chat, you can see where you told yachi that you could “explicity explain everything [nishinoya-san] did to you” after you told us that “being gay paid off”

blueberry milk: that was the first time and i wasn’t “imagining” it :)

noyaoyaoya: oh, is this the chat that’s from?

sun: yuu  _do not_

noyaoyaoya: u can’t stop me babe

sun: YUU

noyaoyaoya: who’s yuu? i’m nishinoya and i’m off to read the previous chats :)

sun: kageyama

sun: i’m gonna throw milk at your face

blueberry milk: honestly that’s a win for me

tsukishima: disgusting

blueberry milk: are YOU??? shaming ME???

tsukishima: i mean,,,

tsukishima: yes.

blueberry milk: well okay

yama: well then

yama: that was pleasant

noyaoyaoya: lmao shouyou i can’t believe u made this chat to talk about how gay for me u are

sun: please shut up

noyaoyaoya: ! ):

noyaoyaoya: that’s no way to talk to ur boyfriend whom u love very much

tanaka: idk man chikara tells me to fuck off a lot so :/

noyaoyaoya: bro ur alive

tanaka: bro i am

noyaoyaoya: bro

tsukishima: if you two are anything like bokuto and kuroo i’m kicking you both from the chat

noyaoyaoya: ooh  _scary_

tanaka: very

 **tsukishima** _has kicked_ **noyaoyaoya** _and_ **tanaka** _from the chat_

tsukishima: fuckers

sun: tsukki that’s not very nice ://

tsukishima: don’t make me kick you out too

sun: u can’t kick out the host :P

tsukishima: well i can kick you irl so it all works out

sun: fuck!

sun: anyway, i would like my boyfriend back if u don’t mind

tsukishima: i do mind

sun: well too bad :)

 **sun** _has added_ **tanaka** _and_ **noyaoyaoya** _to the chat_

tanaka: dang i thought we were free

sun: nah

noyaoyaoya: ayyy

tsukishima: nooo 

yama: tsukki >:(

yama: play nice

tsukishima: you don’t control me anymore

yama: oh? don’t i? :)

tsukishima: fuck nvm i’ll behave

blueberry milk: ??

yama: honestly it’s been like this for years,, since before we got together

tsukishima: i’m actually scared of yamaguchi how humiliating

tsukishima: his smile is not pure it holds many dangers

yama: like all of your secrets but we’ll get to that another time

yachi: ooh spill

yama: not today, i’m afraid

yachi: dang ):

sun: yea ://

tsukishima: shiut up

tsukishima: shut*

yachi: NO YOU MEAN SHIUT

yama: “like shit and shut combined”

yachi: shut the shit up :)

yama: was that aimed at me..?

yachi: :)

yama: oh.

———

yama: i need someone to cuddle me

blueberry milk: me too

yama: ...

blueberry milk: ...

yama: yeah kageyama do u wanna come over and cuddle?

blueberry milk: omw

tsukishima: disgusting?

blueberry milk: omw *to steal your man

tsukishima:  _die_

yama: nobody is going to steal anyone’s man

yama: because i’m not tsukki’s man

yama: and these are just Platonic Cuddles™ okay kageyama?

blueberry milk: i knew that lmao

sun: yuu come over and cuddle me

sun: the not platonic kind

noyaoyaoya: On my way!

tsukishima:  _disgusting_


	3. that’s a little gay ://

ennoshita:  _[image]_

sun: they’ve been caught!

yama: u were literally there

sun: yes but now there’s photographic evidence

yama: jfc it was just a hug

tsukishima: is this going to be a thing now?

noyaoyaoya: now now tsukki don’t be salty

yama: you know what i can’t even be mad

yama: also  _yes_ it’s going to be a thing now

yama: i enjoy kageyama’s hugs vey much

blueberry milk: i’m glad

blueberry milk: i like your hugs too, yamaguchi

yama: :)

yachi: hate to break up the bonding moment but kageyama!!

blueberry milk: yes??

yachi: can i hug you tmrw?? if yama says your hugs are nice, i wanna see for myself!!

blueberry milk: sure??

yachi: yay!

sun: me too!!

blueberry milk: of course

sun: yayayyay!!! :D

sun: i wonder how nice a hug from grumpy old yamayama-kun feels

yama: it feels very nice

yama: be prepared

———

yachi: HOLY SHIT I WAS NOT PREPARED

yachi: THAT WAS ??? SO NI C E ???

sun: indeed it was

yama: u don’t sound very enthusiastic >:(

sun: i’m debating over whether i like yuu’s or kageyama’s hug’s better

noyaoyaoya: well u can come and hug me to make that easier to decide

sun: omw!

noyaoyaoya: nice

blueberry milk: i honestly don’t see what’s so great about my hugs??

blueberry milk: one of the first years came up to me and asked if they could hug me because apparently i hug nice

yama: despite looking ready to kill a man 24/7 ur really soft

yama: it’s great

blueberry milk: ...really?

yachi: really!!

yachi: makes me want to hug you all the time :)

blueberry milk: please do

———

yama: is it just me or does yachi seem less scared of kageyama now

yachi: we had a bonding moment

ennoshita: i mean it’s great but they’re always hugging during practice

sun: i know

sun: it’s adorable

ennoshita: i mean yeah but?

ennoshita: practice is practice

yama: ennoshita-san, if it wasn’t her, it would be ME hugging him

ennoshita: well then

sun: with all due respect,,

sun: that’s a little gay, yamaguchi ://

yama: ur a little gay

sun: hey now,,,

sun: that was unnecessary

sun: also, i’m a lot gay ;)

noyaoyaoya: oho? ;)

yama: ur a lot more open in this chat than the other

sun: suga-san isn’t here, therefore i have no reputation to uphold

yama: HOEMYGOD

yachi: “hoe”

yama: i meant what i said

sun: HEY NOW,,,

sun: actually you know what

sun: i dont even care

blueberry milk: because it’s true?

sun: you.

sun:  _you shut your whore mouth._

yachi: damn

blueberry milk: ://

tsukishima: he can’t even deny it because he had two boyfriends ha

yama: shut your ass up that was a healthy polyamorous relationship

tsukishima: it was a joke

yama: >:(

blueberry milk: it’s okay yamaguchi i’m not offended

yama: you better be okay i won’t hesitate to kick tsukki’s ass if he offends you

sun: he’s taller and meaner than you yamaguchi

yama: yeah but he won’t hurt me i’m his only friend

tsukishima: ouch

tanaka: you say that like it’s not true

tsukishima: double ouch

sun: it’s okay tsukishima i’ll be your friend

tsukishima: ...

noyaoyaoya: it’s a great offer u should accept it

tsukishima: i guess

yama: congratulations tsukishima kei, you now have two friends!

tsukishima: shut up yamaguchi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if u didn’t read pcc, kageyama dated iwaoi


	4. “platonic”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> take a guess who’s the next child to go in the Suffering Chair™

sun: i love

yama: yes

sun: yuu

noyaoyaoya: yes

noyaoyaoya: OH

noyaoyaoya: excuse my dumb moment

noyaoyaoya: i love you too shouyou

sun: :D

tsukishima: gross

blueberry milk: gross

tsukishima: ew don’t say the same thing as me

blueberry milk: oh okay

yama: cute

tsukishima: really, yamaguchi?

yama: yes really tsukki

yachi: i miss kiyoko

tanaka: me too

yachi: back off you have ennoshita-san

tanaka: gratefully so

ennoshita: oh?

ennoshita: gratefully?

tanaka: do you doubt my love for you

ennoshita: no

ennoshita: just never expected you to say something so open like that

tanaka: well

tanaka: i love you chikara

ennoshita: ///

ennoshita: ...i love you too ryuu

yachi: i’m gonna go tell kiyoko i love her

sun: yay go yachi

yama: yay

yachi: she told me she loves me too

yachi: yachi hitoka who? she fuckin dead

sun: GO YACHI

yama: yay yachi

blueberry milk: i’m suddenly extremely aware of how lonely i am

yama: i’m omw kags this calls for some platonic cuddles

 **yama** _has gone offline_

blueberry milk: :)

 **blueberry milk** _has gone offline_

yachi: when you’re so gay you have to call cuddles with your bff “platonic” so as to not hint at your very gay feelings for him

tsukishima: i fucking hope not

noyaoyaoya: someone a little jealous?

tsukishima: you think so?

tsukishima: what would you do if hinata broke up with you and started crushing on a guy you can barely stand?

tsukishima: because i think that warrants a little jealousy

sun: tsukishima...

tsukishima: because yes i’m still very much in love with tadashi

tsukishima: and watching him get closer to kageyama, even if he doesn’t have romantic feelings for him, makes me so goddamn sick, okay?

tsukishima: i get it. i’m possessive and overly jealous, but i’ve been in love with him practically since we met and i’m not lettinf this relationship end unless i can be 100% certain he doesn’t feel anything for me anymore

 **tsukishima** _has left the chat_

sun: oh no

———

yama: okay, first off: i don’t like kageyama like that

yama: second off, i’m going to speak to tsukki so behave

yachi: that’s what they all say, but good luck

sun: ^^ good luck!

blueberry milk: i hope you can get through to him

yama: me too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can u tell i’m lonely


	5. angstyshima ehe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> things i want to support and see grow: platonic kageyachi

sun: someone explain why yamaguchi looks so dead inside and skipped practice

blueberry milk: not my place to tell

sun: holy shit you actually know

blueberry milk: i was there

blueberry milk: i don’t know how he could possibly be feeling

sun: what happened ???

yachi: i’m really worried now

yama: tsukki told me that he’s still in love with me

sun: oh

yachi: oh no

yachi: you don’t love him back, do you?

yama: no

yama: i think...

yama: i think i like someone else but i’m not sure

yama: i just know that i don’t love tsukki anymore

sun: then you have to tell him that

yama: i know

yama: but it’s hard

yama: he’s been my friend for longer than we dated and i don’t want to lose that relationship

yama: even though it’s already been destroyed

blueberry milk: i..kinda know how that feels

blueberry milk: what with my previous feelings for hinata, oikawa and iwaizumi

blueberry milk: you don’t want to admit the one thing that could hurt either you or them the most

yama: yeah

blueberry milk: it’ll be alright

yama: yeah

———

 _Private messages between_ **blueberry milk** _and_   **yachi**

blueberry milk: i have a problem

yachi: oh???? i am here to help

blueberry milk: it’s kinda stupid

yachi: oh god don’t tell me you’re still in love with the grand king and iwaizumi

yachi: and that everything yamaguchi said got you thinking and feeling sad

blueberry milk: no!

yachi: ...you sure?

blueberry milk: it’s not that i swear

yachi: what is it?? i’ll support you through anything y’know

blueberry milk: i..think i like yamaguchi??

blueberry milk: but he said he likes someone so i..

yachi: wow

yachi: pretty soon yams will have his own harem

yachi: actually, on the topic of harems

yachi: you’re as dense as a harem anime protagonist

yachi: literally i—

blueberry milk: what do you mean??

yachi: just give it time buddy

yachi: you’ll realise soon enough whether you like him or not, and i’m always here to help

blueberry milk: oh

blueberry milk: okay

blueberry milk: thank you, yachi

yachi: no problem my guy

———

_private message between_ **sun** _and_ **tsukishima**

sun: hey, you doin’ okay?

sun: i heard what happened from yamaguchi

sun: actually, we all did

sun: i just wanna know if you’re okay

tsukishima: it’s none of your business

sun: i think it is my business to know if you’re okay

sun: we’re friends, aren’t we?

tsukishima: friends don’t need to know everything about each other

sun: okay then

sun: it’s decided

tsukishima: what’s decided?

sun: i’m coming to your house

sun: right now

sun: and you’re gonna let me in

sun: and i’m gonna cheer you up whether you like it or not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fave tsukishima ships: go


	6. a Loving™ pair of idiots

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ‘tis november first. you know what that means?
> 
> ten days until yamaguchi’s birthday.

noyaoyaoya: i miss shouyou

noyaoyaoya: can i come over?

noyaoyaoya: i’m gonna invite myself over and you can just send me home, since you’re not online rn

sun: yuu no get back inside

noyaoyaoya: but i wanna see you ):

sun: i know, but it’s late and the streets are dark

noyaoyaoya: seeing my boyfriend > my own safety

sun: YUU

sun: GET BACK INSIDE

noyaoyaoya: shouyou hoLY SHIT

noyaoyaoya: I SEE YOU IN MY STREET YOU HYPOCRITE

sun: GOD FUCKIN DAMNIT YUU YOU RUINED MY SURPRISE

noyaoyaoya: i’m coming out to you hold on a sec

sun: oh golly

ennoshita: what even are you two

yachi: a loving couple

yama: who are also a pair of idiots

yachi: you right

tanaka: drag them

ennoshita: you’re also an idiot, tanaka

tanaka: i said drag them not me

ennoshita: too bad

tanaka: harsh

noyaoyaoya: ryuu how dare you

noyaoyaoya: your best friend privelages are revoked

tanaka: how dare YOU

tanaka: i don’t care i don’t need your privelages

noyaoyaoya: rude

noyaoyaoya: i have to go shouyou just threw an eraser at me

blueberry milk: now why would he do that

noyaoyaoya: he wants attention

blueberry milk: makes sense

yama: why do i relate

yachi: do you throw things when you want attention yamaguchi

blueberry milk: no he hits you lightly

yachi: why do you know this

blueberry milk: i get distracted during our cuddle sessions

yachi: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

yama: put that away

yachi: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

yama: AWAY

yachi: dang

tanaka: aggressive

ennoshita: please calm

tanaka: why are you being so defensive, hm?

ennoshita: ryuu no

tanaka: ryuu yes

ennoshita: well okay

yama: i’m not being defensive?

tanaka: hmm...sure

tanaka: moving on from tsukishima that fast?

blueberry milk: what

 **yama** _has kicked_ **blueberry milk** _from the chat_

yama: NOT WHILE HE’S HERE

yachi: WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TELL HIM WHEN YOU ADD HIM BACK

yama: my finger slipped

yachi: you despicable man

yama: i don’t know what i’ll tell him i just...don’t want him to know that i like him yet

tanaka: so you admit that you do like him?

yama: yeah

yama: i like him a lot? somehow?

yama: even though tsukki’s the only one i’ve ever  _really_ liked, i feel that way about kageyama as well?

yama: yeah

yachi: so cute

sun: aight i’m here to see why kageyama was kicked out

sun: oh

sun: OH

sun: YAMAGUCHI OH

yama: please don’t tell him

sun: no i won’t don’t worry

sun: i’ll just tell him you meant to kick out tanaka and kicked him instead and didn’t really realise until now

yama: thank you

yama: if you add him back will he see previous messages

sun: no i disabled that feature when i made this chat

yama: okay

**yama** _has added_ **blueberry milk** _to the chat_

yama: sorry kageyama, i didn’t realise!

blueberry milk: it’s okay yamaguchi

yama: you sure?

blueberry milk: yeah

yama: :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> u bet ur ass i’m making a special chapter dor yamaguchi’s birthday he’s my #1 fave i loVe him so much oh my god


	7. owo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why couldn’t i go the non-complicated route and make it tsukkiyamakage why aM I LIKE THIS
> 
> i guess tho it was bc i didn’t ship kagetsukki at the time ??? and i dont ship tsukkiyama anymore uvu
> 
> also, i ramped up the gay bc i’m Sexually Confused™ and needa let my gay out somehow

**yama** _has added_ **tsukishima** _to the chat_

sun: TSUKISHIMA ARE YOU OKAY

tsukishima: yes i’m okay

sun: OKAy good !!

yachi: very good !!

ennoshita: did you lay out everything clearly, yamaguchi?

yama: yeah

tsukishima: yes, i know 100% that yamaguchi is no longer in love with me and therefore i will try my very best to move on

noyaoyaoya: respec

yachi: t?

noyaoyaoya: respec

sun: respec

yachi: okay

yama: that’s improper grammar but okay

noyaoyaoya: i haven’t said “respec[t]” in months

noyaoyaoya: no proper grammar here

yachi: i don’t think that’s something to be proud of...

noyaoyaoya: let me live yachi

yachi: i guess i can allow that

tsukishima: i canmt

tsukishima: begone illiterate

yama: tsukki you misspelled “can’t”

tsukishima: i took my glasses off i suddenly can’t read idk

yama: hypocrite!

tsukishima: shut up yamaguchi

yama: you can’t see me rn but i’m playing a sad song on my violin

tsukishima: you don’t even own a violin?

yama: this is very true

tsukishima: you’re such a dork honestly

yama: count your dinosaur figures then get back to me on that statement okay thx tsukki

tsukishima: 4

tsukishima: fuck you

blueberry milk: i counted 5 “i want you to believe” posters on oikawa-san’s wall once and numerous alien based belongings all through his room

tsukishima: a true dork

yama: good to see you tobi

sun:  _[image sent]_ kageyama‘s so red

sun: blueberry who?

tanaka: OWO

yachi: gay

sun: you’re gay

yachi: i’m poly biTCh

sun: sorry!!!

yachi: no hinata it’s okay i’m not mad oh golly

sun: okay :)

noyaoyaoya: i just died a little inside but yknow,,, in a good way

yachi: me every time kiyoko stands in the vicinity of me

sun: bAck to the other “issue” !!!!

sun: KAGEYAMS IS RED BECAUSE YAMAGUCHI CALLED HIM BY HIS GIVEN NAME

sun: which brings me to another point:

sun:  _yamaguchi called kageyama by his given name_

yama: platonically

noyaoyaoya: god you sound like a 13 year old white boy

yama: okay hush he calls me tadashi sometimes but it’s just a friend thing

yachi: true

yachi: when it’s just us i call him tobio and he calls ne hitoka (bc we’re opposite sex we don’t want ppl thinking we’re together okay no hetero)

tanaka: when you two hug do you just,,, quietly whisper “no hetero”

yachi: i did once and he laughed i died a little he’s so precious

yama: i wish to hear him laugh

sun: YOUR GAY IS SHOWING

yama: sweetie my gay’s been showing this entire time

yama: BUT SOMEONE IS TOO DENSE TO REALISE I HAVE A BIG DUMB CRUSH ON THEM

tanaka: OWO

yachi: actually kags’ been gone for a while where he be sun

sun: i’m legally changing my name to sun shouyou goodbye

sun: and blueberry boy be fuckin dead

sun: he pulled my blanket off my bed and is snuggled in it

sun: he threw his phone and it’s next to me

yama: i am,,, intrigued

sun:  _[image sent]_

yama: i’m gay

yachi: mood

sun: he still blush

yachi: i want to pinch his cheeks

sun: i just did and told him it’s from u yachi

sun: he said thank you

yachi: bleSS

yama: hinata give kageyama his phone for a quick sec

sun: sure???

———

 _private message between_ **yama** _and_ **blueberry milk**

**yama** is calling...

accept   ~~decline~~

———

”Tobio, you’re being really dense.”

Not what Kageyama expected Yamaguchi to say when he picked up the phone, but all right. Kageyama was about to respond when the other boy spoke up again.

”And this is definitely not how I pictured this going, but hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do, right?”

Kageyama remained silent, confused as to what was happening. In front of him, Hinata squatted, bouncing on the balls of his feet excitedly. Did he know what was happening.

_”I like you, Tobio.”_

With a  _click_ , Yamaguchi had hung up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay semi-spoiler but for yamaguchi’s bday i’m doiNg a PCC reunion n i’m only telling y’all bc i’m chANgiNg the ships a lil ehehehehe bc i’m problematic and can’t write things i don’t ship


	8. The Thing™

sun: yamaguchi he is ???? not okay ??

sun: whAT did u SAY 

yama: not much

yama: just that he’s really dense and i like him

sun: oh

sun: YAMAGUCHI

yachi: YAMAGUCHI OMG

sun: CONGRATS ON UR CONFIDENCE

yachi: ^^ WHAT HE SAID

sun: ANYway i gotta go comfort kageyama

sun: he turned his phone off and i think he’s 1 second off screaming into my blanket

yachi: hinata is it okay if i came over to comfort him as well

sun: it’s okay with me but wait a sec

yachi: yee

sun: my mum says it’s okay and kageyama said he would like it very much if you came over

yachi: okay i’m omw

yama: ehe tell tobi that i’m extremely sorry if i made him uncomfortable

sun: “he didn’t. i’m actually really happy.” — kageyama tobio

yama: OH

tsukishima: great now yamaguchi broke too

noyaoyaoya: why are the second years such messes

tanaka: second year must be the time for Eternal Suffering™

sun: i haven’t suffered yet i’m just gonna go pray for a bit

yachi: rip hinata

yachi: btw i’m almost there i’m gonna log off now

sun: okay!! see you soon :)

yachi: !!

———

 _private message between_ **blueberry milk** _and_ **yama**

blueberry milk: hey tadashi, do you want to hang out tomorrow?

yama: sure, why?

blueberry milk: a date

blueberry milk: i’m asking you out

blueberry milk: i like you too

yama: oh

yama: yes of course i’ll go on a date with you !!!!!!!

blueberry milk: great :)

———

**“What’s a first year?”**

yachi: KAGS DID YOU DO THE THING

blueberry milk: YES I DID THE THING

yachi: DID THE THING GO WELL

blueberry milk: THE THING WENT WELL

yachi: I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU

blueberry milk: AAAHHH

noyaoyaoya: what’s this “thing”?

sun: asking yamaguchi on a date

ennoshita: oh thank fuck

tsukishima: yamaguchi is really happy and that’s gross

sun: your best friend’s happiness is gross

tsukishima: no the fact that he’s happy because of the king is gross

yama: [breathe in]

yama: ur gross lol

tsukishima: why are you This Way

yama: i got like two hours sleep last night because i was worried that i scared tobio off

tsukishima: YOU NEED TO NAP OR SOMETHING

yama: yeah i was just about to, actually

tsukishima: okay good please take care of yourself

blueberry milk: ^^ i feel bad that you lost sleep over me

yama: ‘s okay tobi

blueberry milk: :(

yama: ‘m gonna sleep now g’night

blueberry milk: goodnight tadashi

**yama** _has gone offline_

sun: gay

blueberry milk: sHUT UP

sun: no it was cUTE OKAY

blueberry milk: OKAY

yachi: kags’ two moods: soft and aggressive

yachi: maybe aggressively soft if it’s the right person 

sun: the “right person” is yamaguchi

blueberry milk: ://

ennoshita: stop teasing the poor boy

blueberry milk: thank you ennoshita-san

ennoshita: let him be soft

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn’t intend this but it happened so there y’all go


	9. idk what to call this chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> call me the irl daisuga bc i have the same mole as suga + i’m missing a tooth (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

sun: yuu

noyaoyaoya: shouyou

sun: do you know what kageyama and yamaguchi getting together means?

noyaoyaoya: that they’ve both finally found happiness in a person that can take care of them properly?

tsukishima:  _hey_

sun: well, yes but i didn’t mean that

tsukishima:  ** _hey_**

sun: i  _meant_ that we have competition for cutest couple in the vbc!

noyaoyaoya: oh shit you’re right!

yama: pls calm you’ll remain the cutest couple

sun: doubting your abilities?

blueberry milk: i’m not one for pda, so...

yama: ^ i only really “showed pda” when tsukki made sure we proved that we were gayer than y’all

tsukishima: the “were” is hurting more than it should

yachi: mood

blueberry milk: did something happen with kiyoko-san because i’m not afraid to fight a woman

yachi: NO NO KAGS EVERYTHING WITH KIYOKO IS FINE

yachi: it’s just that..

yachi: everything is a mood

blueberry milk: oh okay good

yachi: my knight in shining armour

yama: hey tobi would you fight tsukki for me

tsukishima: i’ve done nothing wrong yamaguchi why

yama: whyn’t

blueberry milk: i’d fight tsukishima if he looked at me the wrong way which is weird because he always looks at me like that why haven’t we fought yet tsukishima meet me outside the gym after practice so we can fight

sun: that was so wild

sun: yuu would you fight to defend my honour

noyaoyaoya: i’d lose

sun: true

noyaoyaoya: rude

sun: i was just confirming a statement?

noyaoyaoya: true

tsukishima: no king i won’t fight you tf

yachi: i bet yamaguchi held a knife to his throat until he said that

yama: you’d be right

tsukishima: you’re not even close to me stop this

yama: gotta instil fear into the hearts of the enemies

ennoshita: we’re on the same team tf

yama: never know who could be your enemy

sun: would you hold a knife to kageyama’s throat?

yama: no i actually like him

tsukishima: i’m offended ??

sun: me ?? too ??

yachi: yamaguchi i thought we were friends

yama: i have no friends. only tobi and enemies.

sun: hey,,,,

sun: stop that.

yama: okay lmao ur all my friends

blueberry milk: are you okay tadashi? did you get enough sleep?

blueberry milk: you’re acting a little weird

yama: that is my cue to blast bye guy’s i’m gonna nap

blueberry milk: i’m gonna come over so we can nap together

blueberry milk: is that okay?

yama: oh god yes please

blueberry milk: okay let me just put on my shoes and i’ll be over

sun: what’s this about yuu and i staying the cutest couple?

yama: ssh i’m napping

tsukishima: i can’t believe you

yama: i can

tsukishima: i hate you

yama: i went through ur Great Depression™ with you

yama: i’ve earned my title of best friend

yama: you can’t hate me

sun: i helped him through his second Great Depression™

yama: i don’t like you hinata

noyaoyaoya: keep telling yourself that

sun: i’m swooning

noyaoyaoya: no need for sarcasm

sun: （＾＿－）≡★

tsukishima: really

yachi: noya & hinata:  (*´∀｀*人*´∀｀*)

yachi: external tsukishima:  (;¬_¬)

yachi: internal tsukishima: ˞͛꒰๑ऀ •̆ꈊ͒ू•̆๑ऀ꒱

tsukishima: what the fuck even is that

yachi: your internal emotions

yama: tsukki hasn’t felt any emotions since 1929

tsukishima: why 1929

yama: America's "Great Depression" began with the dramatic crash of the stock market on "Black Thursday", October 24, 1929 when 16 million shares of stock were quickly sold by panicking investors who had lost faith in the American economy.

tsukishima: you little shit

yama: can’t talk tobi’s here gonna get some cuDDLES

tsukishima: COME BACK HERE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got a new kaomoji keyboard can u tell
> 
> also all i know about the great depression was that it was about money and i only know that bc of a Jackie French novel i read in 5th grade lmao


	10. PCC !!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to be less confused if u didn’t read pcc: the original couples were:
> 
> daisuga  
> kuroken  
> iwaoi/iwaoikage  
> bokuaka  
> tensemi (for a chapter)
> 
> ALSO ! since i’ve seen people talk about forcing gender roles on suga w the “mother” thing, i’ve called him dad :)

**Suga** _opened the chat_

Suga: ‘sup fuckers

Suga: i have been informed that it’s one of my baby crow’s birthdays

Suga: SO

Suga: HAPPY BIRTHDAY YAMAGUCHI

daichi: happy birthday!

oikawaii: he doesn’t get a proper hbd from me bc he called me old on my bday >:(

iwa: hbd!

sun: I ALREADY WISHED U A HAPPY BDAY IN THE OTHER CHAT BUT HBD YAMAGUCHI

furry: happy bday !!

kenma: hbd

akaashi.: happy birthday

bokuhoot: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

tendowo: HBD !

semisemi: hbd!

tsukishima: happy birthday yama <3

noyaoyaoya: HAPPY BIRTH

tanaka: HBD

ennoshita: happy birthday yamaguchi!

yachi: HAPPY BIRTHDAY YAMA !!!

blueberry milk: happy birthday tadashi

yama: ahaha thank you guys ! <3

Suga: hold uP

Suga: kageyama did you just call yamaguchi by his first name?

sun: a lot has happened in the time since you guys graduated

Suga: okay

Suga: then

Suga: everyone do matching couple names again

semisemi: sigh

 **semisemi** _has changed their name to_ **semiowo**

semiowo: happy?

Suga: one down

semiowo: is anyone even single in this chat

tsukishima: i am

furry: tSUKKI :(

tsukishima: go awAY

furry: :(

 **noyaoyaoya** _has changed their name to_ **he protec**

 **sun** _has changed their name to_ **he attac**

he protec: but sadly,

he attac: no snac :(

tsukishima: i hate you both

he attac: i hate me too it’s okay

he protec: i will not allow this come oVER AND LET ME LOVE YOU

he attac: omw bby

he protec: nice

tsukishima: i just threw up in my mouth a little

yama: swallow it back up

tsukishima: DIE

yama: it was juST A SUGGESTION

 **daichi** _has changed their name to_ **thighs**

 **iwa** _has changed their name to_ **arms**

yama: THIS IS NEW

arms: it is

akaashi.: indeed

 **akaashi.** _had changed their name to_ **akahoot**

akahoot: this is stupid

semiowo: at least you’re not branded as a furry

kenma: remember when my user was nya

semiowo: i apologise, kenma

kenma: what i thought

he protec: won’t you have to change it back though?

kenma: i’m joining tsukishima in the singles club

kenma: i’m aro

tsukishima: if you weren’t all the way in tokyo i’d highfive you rn

he protec: oh,, so u realised u were aro while with kuroo?? cool

kenma: yeah

he attac: that’s great kenma!!!

kenma: thank you shouyou

oikawaii: speaking of tetsu

yama: TEtSU

 **oikawaii** _has changed their name to_ **tooru**

 **furry** _has changed their name to_ **tetsu**

tooru: they rhyme

Suga: good enough

 **ennoshita** _has changed their name to_ **chill**

 **tanaka** _has changed their name to_ **no chill**

he attac: VERY TRUE

no chill: i’d be offended if it wasn’t true

 **yachi** _has changed their name to_ **villager #2**

villager #2: i told kiyoko to change her name to “leading role” but idk if she’ll do it

kiyoko: if you’re villager #2 then i’m a shrub

villager #2: nononO DONT PUT YOURSELD DOWN LIKE THAT

 **villager #2** _has changed_ **kiyoko** _’s name to_ **villager #1**

villager #2: tHeRe

villager #1: hmm, okay

villager #2: :))))

yama: yachi your gay is showing

villager #2: my gay is always showing

yama: true

 **yama** _has changed his name to_ **stars**

 **blueberry milk** _has changed his name to_ **moon**

moon: i was bullied into it

stars: gentle persuasion and bullying are two different things

moon: i was gently persuaded into it

he attac: isn’t tsukki the moon

stars: yeah but stars and meteor doesn’t sound romantic

villager #2: mood

stars: everything is a mood to you

villager #2: this is true

Suga: a lot...has happened...

Suga: anyWay

tsukishima: what about you, suga-san?

Suga: what about me?

tsukishima: are you single too?

Suga: oh...no

Suga: but my boyfriend isn’t in this chat

he attac: THEN ADD HIM

he protec: ADD HIM

tooru: ADD

tetsu: HIM

yama: ADD HIM

Suga: okay!

 **Suga** _has added_ **yaku** _to the chat_

yaku: what

Suga: ehe hello morisuke

yaku: koushi what the fUck

Suga: if you scroll up you’ll see we are reuniting a gc, and i was bullied to add you

Suga: and on that note

Suga: we need to match names

 **Suga** _has changed their name to_ **dad #1**

 **dad #1** _has changed_ **yaku** _’s name to_ **dad #2**

dad #2: why are you #1

dad #1: because i’m better

dad #1: HOLY SHIT I CAN HEAR HIM COMING DAI CAN I SNEAK OVER TO YOUR PLACE

thighs: no suffer

dad #1: wow rude

dad #1: nvm thank you

dad #1: the morisuke is an affectionate one who is snuggling me i am in peace

moon: do you two live together already?

dad #1: we share a uni dorm

dad #2: uni caused a lot of things

arms: oikawa and i split up not long before heading to uni for reasons and you would not believe what happened after he met his roommate

tooru: shut ur mouth

arms: he called me up and started whining about how hot he was

tooru: SHUT UP

arms: And then he found out that the Roommate was Kuroo Tetsurou, whom oikawa had already met through this groupchat

tooru: essentially i fell in love with a furry before i knew he was a furry

tetsu: FOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT A FURRY

tooru: i’ve seen your closet don’t lie to me

he attac: so did you and daichi get together because of the dorms, iwaizumi-san?

arms: uh, no

thighs: suga and oikawa set us up

arms: because we were both

thighs: “sad individuals who needed to get out more”

villager #2: mood

tendowo: you guys are lucky

tendowo: i haven’t seen eita in ten years

semiowo: i left your apartment ten minutes ago stop being dramatic

tendowo: see?

tendowo: walking out if my life as if it means nothing .・゜゜・（／。＼）・゜゜・．

semiowo: YOU DO THIS EVERY TIME

tendowo: he’s abusive, even

tendowo: yelling when i mess up even slightly  (▰˘︹˘▰)

semiowo: why did i sign up for this

tetsu: that’s how i feel whenever tooru speaks

tooru: excuse you my voice is delightful

tetsu: i guess lmao

tooru: no cuddles for you tonight

tetsu: NO IM SORRY I TAKE IT BACK I LOVE YOUR VOICE

tooru: too late! the damage is done! (`へ´*)ノ

tetsu: :(

tetsu: i’ll let you pick the movies for our next 3 movie nights

tooru: come to my room whenever you want cuddles

tetsu: we practically share a room i

tooru:  (;-_-)/

tetsu: oKay i’m coming into YOUR room rn to redeem my cuddles

villager #2: is this how a drug deal is done

tsukishima: i don’t think so

he attac: drugs are worth  _at least_ 5 movie nights

dad #2: how do you know this

he attac: that’s how many it took for yuu to let me stay the night at his house

dad #1: did he make you walk home in the middle of the night i’m not afraid to fight him

he attac: no!!!

he attac: we always had movie nights at my house idk why he didn’t have them at his house

he protec: i hadn’t told my parents about you so we couldn’t have cuddled on the couch

he attac: makes sense

moon: your relationship is confusing

stars: tobio you’re confusing

moon: this is true

he attac: y’know who’s relationship is more confusing than mine?

moon: whos?

he attac: ennoshita-san and tanaka-san’s

villager #2: TRUE

chill: how so

villager #2: do u love him or hate him idk man ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

chill: of course i love him??

stars: we know, ennoshita-san

villager #2: it's a joke

chill: oh,, of course

dad #1: so...

dad #1: anyone got any gossip to share?

thighs: why are you like this

dad #1: i can't help it, dai

thighs: you probably can but alright

stars: gossip, hmm...

stars: all i know is that tobi and yachi and are bffls now and tobio's hugs are literally the best thing on earth

tsukishima: your word choices still amaze me

stars: my speech isn't  _that_ weird!

tsukishima: remember that time you said "he wants sum fuck" instead of "he has a crush on him"?

stars:  i'm deleting this chat

stars: wait what did i even say this time

tsukishima: "bffls"

stars: their bond is one that cannot be broken

villager #2: idk man kags ignored me for a whole day that one time i accidentally threw his unfinished milk box away

moon: it was perfectly good milk!

villager #2: it felt empty!

moon: IT WASN'T

villager #2: I KNOW I'M SORRY

moon: okay

moon: i'm sorry for yelling

villager #2: it's okay

dad #1: i feel like we miss a lot of stuff now

dad #2: i feel offended that i wasn't added to this chat in high school

dad #1: nobody knew who you were in high school

dad #2: i will end you

dad #1: no you won't

dad #2: yeah i guess you're right

dad #1: :)

tooru: gross

villager #2: you literally just had one of those moments before

tooru: i don't want to hear that from you

villager #2: what have i done

tooru: dunno 

tooru: that's just something i've always wanted to say

villager #2: MOOD

he attac: yachi we know

villager #2: aight damn

stars: hey, uh, guys

stars: i've decided to form a club

stars: called the Protect Kageyama Tobio Club

villager #2: I WANT IN

stars: yachi is now the vice-president

he attac: what'd he do now?

stars: we hadn't seen each other yet today, right?

stars: and so he just

stars: showed up to my house and just??

stars: handed me chocolate milk

tsukishima: don't you hate milk though?

stars: yes but i loVE chocolate milk smh tsukki you've known me for four years

stars: on with the story

stars: he ran away after that because he was embarressed

stars: but i called him back and we did a Thing

he attac: they kiSSed

stars: and now he's asleep in my lap God Bless

villager #2: SEND PICS

he attac: whoa yachi

villager #2: i'm Kags Fan #2 what do you expect?

he attac: why not #1?

villager #2: that's yamaguchi

stars: DAMN RIGHT

stars: anyway

stars:  _[image attached]_

stars: look at my boyfriend he is v cute and i love him v much

dad #1: i have never seen images of Soft Kageyama before i need more

tooru: YAMAGUCHI

stars: y E S OIKAWA-SAN

tooru: i have some Soft Kageyama photos i never got around to deleting

tooru: do you want me to send them to you?

stars: YES OMG

tooru: okay i'll send them through dms

stars: the lords have blessed me

villager #2: okay is  _this_ a drug deal?

dad #2: yes

dad #2: this is a drug deal

dad #1: drugs are bad morisuke

dad #2: yeS THEY ARE

thighs: who's doing drugs

chill: yamaguchi, apparently

stars: i'm not doing drugs

stars: not yet at least

arms: no drugs what the hell

stars: a jOKE IT WAS A JOKE

stars: drugs aRE BAD

thighs: this is true

stars: oh!

stars: kageyama woke up, i gotta go!

stars: thank you all for taking the time to wish me a happy birthday, and even just to chat :)

dad #1: no problem, yamaguchi

dad #1: i'm gonna close the chat for a while now

dad #1: goodbye everyone!

**dad #1** _has closed the chat_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is late but who cares lmao happy belated birthday to the best haikyuu boy!


	11. fucc i forgot to name this one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i finished voltron legendary defender in three days and i regret none of my decisions
> 
> i just wanted to get SOMETHING out sorry it’s so short

sun: this chat died what the heck

tsukishima: mood

sun: stop being emo

tsukishima: my parents told me i could be whatever i wanted and i chose to be emo go away

yachi: that’s a terrible thing to be

yama: tsukki u suck

tsukki: so do you it’s okay

yama: ye and u know first hand that i do lol

ennoshita: excuse

yama: i mean he’s had to put up with me for five years ??

ennoshita: oh that suck lil

yama: heATHEN

yachi: yamahuchi you once admitted to having skype sex with tsukishima

yama: no that was all him i’m an innocent bystander

blueberry milk: innocent...

noyaoyaoya: WASTED

yama: i hATE u tobi

yachi: that’s the one thing that i don’t think is a mood

blueberry milk: oh

sun: u good kags

blueberry milk: honestly i don’t even care because i know tadashi will come begging to cuddle by the end of the day

yama: i’d be offended if that wasn’t true

yachi: your relationship is so pure i just shed a tear

sun: no i once overheard them arguing about milk

sun: it was  _really_ intense

noyaoyaoya: i mean,,,

noyaoyaoya: yamaguchi would probably kill tsukishima before he drank milk and kageyama would kill tsukishima so he could drink milk

tsukishima: WHY ARE YOU TARGETING ME

noyaoyaoya: because ur mean

tsukishima: rude

sun: just like u

tsukishima: i thought we were friends

sun: u and yamaguchi are friends but he told kageyama to fight u

tsukishima: that’s different i’m scared of yamaguchi

yama: slightly offended but ok

sun: mood

yachi: omg mood

yama: oh i’ll show u “mood”  (｡+･`ω･´)

sun: i have to go water natsu gtg

noyaoyaoya: WATER NATSU

yama: isn’t that his sister

tsukishima: he  _is_ a little dumb

yama: that’s no way to talk to your friend

tsukishima: at our first sleepover you told me if i didn’t “shut the fuck up and let [you] sleep” that you’d throw me all the way to australia

yama: nice

blueberry milk: australia has golden gaytimes i wanna go there

yama: ??

blueberry milk: oikawa-san showed iwaizumi-san and i an ad for them when we were dating

blueberry milk: wait a sec

blueberry milk: [it’s back y’all](https://youtu.be/YshX_hzAXow)

yama: thAT’S THE BEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN

sun: DAMN RIGHT IT’S HARD TO HAVE A GAY TIME ON UR OWN

yama: he back

sun: natsu didn’t appreciate being watered

noyaoyaoya: DID YOU ACTUALLY I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU

sun: she’s dripping wet now i think she hates me

noyaoyaoya: just the thouGHT of it makes me hate u goodbye good sir

sun: no come back ily

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a random stranger: breathes  
> me: oMG MOOD


	12. tsukki is gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> VERY minor voltron legendary defenders spoilers bc i’m tradh

tsukishima: S04E02

yama: SHUT UP TSUKKI I CRIED

sun: what

yama: PIDGE DIDNT deseRVE TBIS

sun: OH R U TALKING ABOUT VLD

yama: YA

sun: OH MYGOD ES PIDGE DIDN T DESEBRE THAT

blueberry milk: wasn’t it a code tho

sun: KAGEYAMA U WATCH VLD

blueberry milk: of course i do i’m not some heathen

sun: yamaguchi made u didnt he

yama: nO actually !!!

yama: tobi made me watch it :)))

sun: REALLY

yama: he’s such a dork hoNestly

blueberry milk: stop exposing me

sun: aNywAy

sun: what’s up w/ shiro y’all

yama: he fuckin’ dead oh mY mg Od

tsukishima: god i wish that were me

sun: SHUT UT U EMO SON OF A BITHC I’m comiNG OVER TO LOVE U

tsukishima: what ok

———

tsukishima: nishinoya-san

noyaoyaoya: yes

tsukishima: i have some...

tsukishima: “cute” photos of hinata

noyaoyaoya: i’ll take them i assume theyre at the normal price

tsukishima: yup

sun: what

noyaoyaoya: SHTI TSUKKI U STATYED THE CONVO IN THE GC

tsukishima: yeah to expose you

noyaoyaoya: u evil, evil man

tsukishima: :)

sun: tsukishima why do u have photos of me

tsukishima: to give to nishinoya-san in exchange for money

noyaoyaoya: THAT’S A LIE AND YOU KNOW IT

tsukishima: JUST LET ME APPRECIATE HIS CUTENESS GOD DAMNIT

sun: what

tsukishima: platonically

noyaoyaoya: god u sound like yamaguchi

yama: RUDE

sun: WHAT IS HAPPENING

yama: tsukki’s being gay

sun: wow mood

tsukishima: i’m not being gay wth yamaguchi i’m just appreciating his looks for the Aesthetics

yama: that reminds of me when i was your age,,,,

yama: refusing to admit that kageyama was attractive,,,

blueberry milk: um ok

yama: saying he was just aesthetically pleasing,,,,

tsukishima: no but

tsukishima: UGH

 **tsukishima** _sent a .jpg attachment_

tsukishima: AESTHETIC

yama: nvm i was wrong

noyaoyaoya: i’m not paying for that one uwu

tsukishima: fuck

noyaoyaoya: hhhahhahA

yachi: what is up with y’all and drug deals i dont ,,, understand

tsukishima: drugs are great

yama: TSUKKI

tsukishima: IM KIDDING I HAVE NEVER DONE DRUGS IN MY LIFE

tsukishima: I’M A GOOD KID

sun: if ur a good kid why r u selling photos of me

tsukishima: details, details

sun: i can’t believe u

tsukishima: i can

yama: i just got déjà vu

yachi: mood

yama: yachi hush

yachi: ok

yama: ok why aren’t we talking about tsukki’s crush on hinata

tsukishima: because it’s not real

blueberry milk: been there done that

sun: KAGEYAMA IM—

blueberry milk: ITS TRUE

blueberey milk: and i can joke about it because i don’t like you anymore

sun: cool

sun: where’s yuu i need cuddles

noyaoyaoya: omw shouyou

sun: yesss

yama: tsukki why don’t u join them

tsukishima: why are you trying to set me up with THEM

yama: bc polyamory is a thing and i just want to see you happy

tsukishima: well, i don’t have a crush on either of them so not going to happen

yama: whatever floats ur boat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> foreshadowing (?:


	13. operation tsukkinoyahina

_private message between_ **tsukishima** _and_ **yama**

tsukishima: i’m being attacked

yama: send pics or it didn’t happen

 **tsukishima** _sent a .jpg attachment_

yama: that’s not attacking

yama: they’re loving you

tsukishima: disgusting

yama: oh pls u can’t tell me ur not loving them right back

tsukishima: ,,,,

yama: OH MY GOD TSUKKI

tsukishima: HUSH

yama: TSUKKI OMG WHAT R U GONNA DO

tsukishima: sit quietly and suffer

yama: THATS NOT AN OPTIONS

tsukishima: yamaguchi no

yama: yamaguchi yes

———

 _private message between_ **yama** _and_ **yachi**

 **yama** _has sent a .jpg attachment_

yachi: i’m gonna pause whatever u were gonna say to say that tsukishima takes excellent pics

yama: how’d u know it was tsukki’s lol

yachi: u’d be cuddling w/ kags, not hinata and noya

yama: true lol

yachi: also his body is really lanky

yama: TRUE

yama: anyway, are you thinking what i’m thinking?

yachi: hell yeah i am

yama: good (;

———

 **yama** _has added_ **yachi** _and_ **ennoshita** _to a new conversation_

 **yama** _has named the chat_ **operation tsukkinoyahina**

ennoshita: why me

yama: bc you, yachi and i are the only ones smart enough to pull this off

yachi: i’m—

yama: anyway

yama: y’all on board?

yachi: YES

ennoshita: ok

yama: yes ok

yama: just

yama: i needa think of a plan

yachi: wow so prepared

yama: HUSH YACHI

yama: i confessed to tobio on a whim idk how to do this

yachi: (;

ennoshita: first of all, do u know that tsukishima likes them?

yama: o ya

ennoshita: that’s good

yama: just find out if they like him

yama: GOOD IDEA

yama: i’ll be back w/ screenshots (;:

yachi: the hecc ok

———

_private message between_ **yama** _and_ **sun**

yama: what’s ur opinion on tsukki

sun: why

yama: i need to look out for a friend ok i’m asking everyone

sun: is he feeling insecure ???

sun: IF HE IS I NEEDA LET HIM KNOW THAT I LOVE AND APPRECIATE HIM ASAP

yama: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ?

sun: o

sun: ya i guess lol

yama: OH MY GOD

sun: u asked lmao

yama: ya ik sorry

sun: ‘s ok

———

**operation tsukkinoyahina**

**yama** _has sent a .jpg attachment_

yama: one down

yachi: OH

ennoshita: yay

———

_private message between_ **yama** _and_ **noyaoyaoya**

yama: opinion on tsukki go

noyaoyaoya: he’s cool and dorky and is nice when he wants to be

noyaoyaoya: overall, i appreciate him a lot and think he fits in really well with shouyou and i

yama: is this going where i think it’s going

noyaoyaoya: maybe ???

noyaoyaoya: ik shouyou likes him and i guess i do too ? idk

yama: oh my god

noyaoyaoya: that’s ok, right?

yama: yes ofc omg

yama: y’all have my blessing as his best friend

noyaoyaoya: ...ok??

———

**operation tsukkinoyahina**

**yama** _has sent a .jpg attachment_

yama: WE HAVE LIFTOFF FUCKERS

yachi: YES O M G

ennoshita: oh yes!

ennoshita: what are we going to do now, though?

yama: gently persuade them

ennoshita: oh no

———

_private message between_ **yama** _and_ **tsukishima**

yama: ask them out

tsukishima: what no

yama: trust me, they like you

yama: ask them out

tsukishima: hng

yama: you don’t have to, but just trust me

yama: they’ll say yes

———

tsukishima: i didn’t have to ask them

yama: w h. A t

tsukishima: they asked me

yama: AND WHAT DID YOU SAY

tsukishima: i said yes calm down

yama: HE C. C YES

———

**operation tsukkinoyahina**

**yama** _has sent a .jpg attachment_

———

**sun** _has added_ **noyaoyaoya** _and_ **tsukishima** _to a  new conversation_

**sun** _has named the conversation_ **poly volley gays™**

sun: welcome to the relationship, kei :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> didn’t wanna Angst™ it so


	14. ???? idk

yama: lunch break is like 10x more wild now that tsukki, nishinoya-san and hinata are together

yachi: how so

yama: well, first off,

yama: hinata punched tsukki in the gut so he’d be able to reach tsukki’s face when he bent over in pain

yama: and then hinata and nishinoya-san kissed his cheeks real quick

yachi: cute !!

yama: tsukki blushed so hard it was hilarious

**yama** _sent a .jpg attachment_

yachi: oh my god

yama: ik!!

yama: remember when he tried to tell us he didn’t like them?

tsukishima: stop exposing me

yama: you exposed yourself

tsukishima: shut

yama: (^_−)☆

yachi: can u tell me more lunchbreak stories i’m intrigued

yama: oh yes i can

tsukishima: S T. O P

yama: tsukki has absolutely no problem when calling hinata by his first name

yama: but refuses to call nishinoya-san by his first name ???

yama: so it’s just like “hey shouyou, nishinoya-san”

yama: and nishinoya-san pouts for a while

**yama** _sent a .jpg attachment_

yama: look at that face

yachi: TSUKISHIMA HOW COULD YOU

sun: yeah kei >:(

sun: making the loml sad >>:(

tsukishima: IT’S AWKWARD OKAY

noyaoyaoya: h o w

tsukishima: YOU’RE MY SENPAI IT JUST FEELS WEIR D

sun: now u got him started

noyaoyaoya: SHUT UP SHOUYOU

sun: ;)

**yama** _sent a .mp4 attachment_

yachi: tag yourself i’m the “say it or i’ll burn your ‘land before time’ tape”

sun: i’m the nervous “..- _san_ ” at the end

noyaoyaoya: i’m blushing like a madman

sun: can confirm

**sun** _sent a .jpg attachment_

sun: ‘s cute ((,:

yama: u just broke tsukki oml

yama: he’s ??? so red

yama: HE JUST SCREENSHOTTED THAT PIC OF NOYA

noyaoyaoya: i feel confident

sun: he just stood on my bed wtf

 **noyaoyaoya**   _sent a .mp4 attachment_

noyaoyaoya: u hypocrite

sun: i hate u

**sun** _sent a .mp4 attachment_

sun: get wasted fucker

yachi: DID YOU JUST KICK HIM OFF YOUR BED I CAN’T BELIEVE

yama: tsukki go join them tobio’s coming over soon

sun: oh yea join us kei

noyaoyaoya: cOme oN kEi

tsukishima: jfc ok

sun: yEA

noyaoyaoya: yEEt

sun: never say that again

noyaoyaoya: y e e t

sun: kei get here before i kill our boyfriend

tsukishima: let him die

noyaoyaoya: RUDE

tsukishima: YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF

noyaoyaoya: true


	15. that’s my otp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i fuckin died
> 
> also i’m having hella yamakage feels lemme just ,,,

**dad #1** _opened the chat_

dad #1: i’m bored someone amuse me

stars: don’t u have friends ur own age

dad #1: FIRST OF ALL

dad #1:  _that was very rude_

dad #1: SECOND OF ALL

dad #1: there are 7 people my age in this chat so suck a dick xoxo

stars: ok tobi come here

he attac: i didn’t need that image

stars: y’know i didn’t need to see that picture of u crossdressing b u t it hAPPENED so get over it xoxoxo

he attac: THAT WAS UR OWN FAULT

stars: I DIDN’T KNOW THAT PICTURE WOULD BE THERE

dad #1: ??? what did you do to yourself, yamaguchi ??

moom: he looked through tsukishima’s photos and saw a picture of hinata in lingerie and a skirt

dad #1: why does tsukishima have that picture ???

he attac: o right

he attac: kei do ur thing

tsukishima: do i have to

he protec: yes.

tsukishima: sigh

 **tsukishima** _has changed their name to_ **he bloc**

dad #1: oWo

he bloc: i’ve never hated living so much

he protec: oh hush you love us

he bloc: ...

stars: i have receipts

**he bloc** _has gone offline_

villager #2: big mood

he attac: we know, yachi

villager #2: ):

moon: i saw yachi was sad what’s happening

stars: why don’t you ever come that fast for me?

moon: you never seem sad

stars: that’s true

stars: anyway come cuddle me i’m lonely

moon: ok

stars: YAY

dad #1: be was probably doing something important yamaguchi >:(

stars: he was tossing a volleyball in my backyard

stars: and now he’s giving me love

stars: which is much more impgsfs

dad #1: i—

he attac: yamaguchi are you okay?

dad #1: yamaguchi?

he protec: you okay??

———

“Did you really have to knock my phone out of my hand,” depite what he was saying, Yamaguchi was laughing, rolling backwards to snuggle into Kageyama’s chest. It was warm.

”You called me over to cuddle and you were talking in the groupchat,” Kageyama’s reply was muffled, as his face was buried in Yamaguchi’s hair. “I felt negleced.” Yamaguchi giggled again, snuggling deeper into his boyfriend’s chest.

He loved these moments, when it was just the two of them, tired and warm against each other. Nothing—in his opinion—could compare to the feeling of being wrapped in his Kageyama’s arms and dozing off to sleep. He would give everything he had, just so his future could be like this.

And it was the same for Kageyama—he never imagined holding someone this close felt so _nice_. If he was being honest, he wanted to protect Yamaguchi from any harm that could possibly come their way, and here, with the smaller boy in his arms, he felt like he could do that.

He easily fought off the drowsiness that came with their cuddle sessions, but Yamaguchi was not so lucky, having fallen asleep, face buried in Kageyama’s chest. It was cute.

Kageyama oddly manoeuvred himself to try and reach his phone, which he had discarded somewhere around where Yamaguchi had dropped his. Upon finding it, he spent some time trying to find a good angle to take a picture of his sleeping boyfriend. When he found one, and took a picture, he set it as his lockscreen, kissed Yamaguchi’s head, and opened the groupchat.

———

tetsu: so we all agree that yamaguchi just up and died?

dad #1: i guess

he attac: you’re a horrible parent

he attac: O H KAGEYAMA’S TYPING HE’LL HAVE ANSWERS

moon: he’s not dead dumbasses, i knocked his phone out of his hand so that we could cuddle, and then he fell asleep

dad #1: clingy!kageyama

moon: ):

tetsu: o

dad #1: i’m sorry kags i didn’t mean it

moon: ok

villager #2: pure

thighs: not something i’d associate wih kageyama but ok

dad #1: you literally nominated him to be the pure child

thighs: what’s that? sorry i can’t read

dad #1: >:(

moon: oh tadashi might be waking up i gotta go

dad #1: ok,, have fun kags!

thighs: look after my son

calm: he’s my son now

thighs: i’ll fight you, here and now

bokuhoot: how about i have him

thighs: now listen here, you little shits..

———

Yamaguchi stirred, turning away from Kageyama’s chest to rub the sleep from his eyes. Yawning slightly, he looked towards his boyfriend, who was watching him with a slight smile—the smile nobody but Yamaguchi (and maybe Oikawa and Iwaizumi..) had seen.

Smiling in return, Yamaguchi leaned upwards, pressing his lips to Kageyama’s in a brief and soft kiss. When he pulled away, Kageyama blushed and avoided his gaze. Yamaguchi smiled brighter.

Suddenly, Kageyama pulled him into a tight embrace. Yamaguchi was schocked, but leaned into the touch. He could feel his partner’s breath against his hair, and that was about all he could hear in the silence of the room.

”I love you,” Kageyama whispered. “I love you so much, and I’m not scared of feeling that way anymore. Thank you.”

When Yamaguchi tried to pull away, just slightly, Kageyama pulled him back in. Yamaguchi was confused, until he felt something wet against his head—Kageyama didn’t want him to see him cry.

”The past few months I’ve spent with you have been the best. They’ve been better than when I was pining after Hinata, and better than when I was dating Oikawa and Iwaizumi. Thank you so much, Tadashi. I love you.”

Kageyama pulled him back, and Yamaguchi saw his smile—eyes wet, but happy nonetheless. Yamaguchi felt tears fill his own eyes, and pushed his face into Kageyama’s chest for a tight hug.

Upon pulling away, Yamaguchi leaned up and gave Kageyama another soft kiss, lingering to whisper the words, “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i might do a chapter like this for all the ships? even the brief ones (eg sugayaku, iwadai) but if i do,,, i’ll do the main ships first. how does that sound?


	16. idk what this is happy new year i’m gonna hibernate until july

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year yada yada i don’t care abt that crap
> 
> yamaguchi’s user inspired by one of my discord nicknames (“i love ryuji w/ all my heart”)

yama: it’s a new year...

tsukishima: 2018 more like can this please end

yachi: mood

blueberry milk: that’s not very positive...

sun: GUYS

yama: yes??

sun: ITS A NEW YEAR

yama: i said that but yes

sun: SO IVE DECIDED WE ALL GET NEW USERNAMES

noyaoyaoya: but mine is so iconic

sun: you’ll have it in the other gc hush

noyaoyaoya: ):

sun: start the ritual

blueberry milk: what

 **yama** _has changed_   **tsukishima’s** _name to_ **emo**

yachi: true

emo: i hate living

yama: it fits

**yama** _has changed their name to_ **i love tobi w/ all my heart**

i love tobi w/ all my heart: this also fits

sun: kageyama broke

i love tobi w/ all my heart: as expected

**sun** _changed their name to_ **nishinoya stan**

nishinoya stan: ib yamaguchi (;

noyaoyaoya: ///

**i love tobi w/ all my heart** _changed_ **blueberry milk’s** _name to_ **soft gay**

soft gay: oh

i love tobi w/ all my heart: i love soft gay

soft gay: i love you too

nishinoya stan: oh

nishinoya stan: i love u yuu

noyaoyaoya: dang wish i could say the same ://

noyaoyaoya: IM KIDDING I LOVE YOU VV MUCH SHOUYOU

nishinoya stan: good now change ur name

noyaoyaoya: never

nishinoya stan: u’ve forced my hand...

**nishinoya stan** _changed_ **noyaoyaoya’s** _name to_ **senpai kink**

senpai kink: idec

nishinoya stan: bet

emo: he won’t even last a day

emo: also why are you just a nishinoya stan? i’m here too

senpai kink: is kei...jealous?

nishinoya stan: i’ve stanned yuu longer

emo: I AM NOT

**nishinoya stan** _changed their name to_ **tsukkinoya stan**

tsukkinoya stan: better?

emo: better

senpai kink: defnitely better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ‘ve been meaning to update for weeks


	17. i haven’t updated for a month pls accept this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am not commiter enough to type “i love tobi w/ all my heart” multiple times every chapter

**i love tobi w/ all my heart** _changed their name to_ **soft bi**

 **yachi** _changed their name to_   **mood**

soft gay: oh

soft bi: soft bi loves soft gay

soft gay: i love you too, tadashi

soft bi: (,,:

emo: eugh

soft bi: i have screenshots of you ranting about how cute noya-san and hinata are

emo: i apologise, yamaguchi.

tsukkinoya stan: CAN I HAVE THOSE SCREENSHOTS PLEASE YAMAGUCHI

tsukkinoya stan: ILL SEND ALL MY SOFT KAGEYAMA PHOTOS AND PERSONALLY COLLECT MORE TO SEND YOUR WAY

soft bi: hmm...

emo: i’ll keep being your friend if you don’t give them to him

soft bi: you make a compelling argument...

soft bi: but i’m gonna have to take up hinata’s offer

tsukkinoya stan: Y E. S

emo: i think i should be offended by this...

soft bi: emos don’t know the meaning of “offended”

emo: a little true

———

mood: top thing you’d never think you’d hear go

emo: “how is this supposed to go up my ass”

tsukkinoya stan: STOP !!!!!

soft bi: WAS THAT WHAT YOU SAID HINATA

tsukkinoya stan: !!! S T O P !!!

senpai kink: i can confirm shouyou did say that the first time we were intimately involved with kei

tsukkinoya stan: at least i didn’t fall out of the bed when kei called you senpai !!!

mood: IDJDHSHSH

soft bi: YALL GOTTA STOP

emo: can you guys stop talking about our sex life

senpai kink: we weren’t the ones who sent shouyou’s nudes to yamaguchi

emo: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

emo: I MEANT TO FORWARD THEM TO YOU

senpai kink: HOW DO YOU FUCK UP BETWEEN ME AND YAMAGUCHI

emo: “boyfriend #2” AND “best friend” ARE RIGT NEXT TO EACH OTHER

senpai kink: WHY AM I #2

emo: SHOUYOU’S #2.5

tsukkinoya kink: who’s #1

emo: that was yamaguchi it felt wrong replacing it

soft bi: why did i have a number why wasn’t i “boyfriend <3”

emo: despite my glasses i’m not blind

emo: i knew you liked kageyama before we broke up

soft bi: ...

emo: when he was lonely, i was...willing? to give him a happy and healthy relationship

emo: and then we broke up, so..

soft gay: tadashi is crying why

soft gay: oh

**soft gay** _went offline_

tsukkinoya stan: you broke my best friend

emo: i broke MY best friend !!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m now kurobas > hq but hi the plot thickens


	18. oh my i actually updated before a month has passed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember when i said i’m project myself onto yamaguchi ? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

dad#1: guess who’s coming back from tokyo next week

dad #1: tis me, ya boy

dad #1: and morisuke but he sucks

dad #2: stop insulting me

dad #1: you’ve  _literally_ asked for it before

stars: STOP

moon: but don’t you relate

stars: i mean..i do..but i don’t announce to the entire gc that i have a degredation kink

dad #1: OHMY GDO

he protec: i feel like yamaguchi and kageyama have tried to re-enact 50 shades of grey at one point

stars: we did it was horrible

he protec: SHHSHSHS STOP

tooru: i tried that with iwa-chan once !

arms: you..literally  _begged_ me to tie you up...

tooru: y-yes

stars: did you just type out a stutter

tooru: y-yes

stars: old  _and_ has a screw loose

stars: u got urself a great man there, kuroo-san

tooru:  _so mean_

tetsu: i still love him though, so it’s okay

tooru: tetsu !!!

stars: anyway why are u and yaku-san comin’ down, suga-san?

dad #1: we have a small break and morisuke wants to meet my parents, so...

stars: couldn’t you just come home for the weekend for that?

dad #1: too busy

stars: oh right... _uni_

stars: why’re y’all so old

villager #2: y’all

stars:  _y’aint got nutin’ on me wit’ those pretty lil’ words o’ yers, missy_

village #2: SITOP OH NT TOD

moon: i would like to file for a divorce

stars: TOBI NO DHSHSH

dad #1: i...am appauled, yamaguchi

he attac: yamaguchi is my role model

he blocc: ignore him, shouyou

he blocc: he’s delirious

stars: a little, yes

he attac: wait, actually?!?

stars: i haven’t slept in like 3 days

stars: tobi...pls come over

moon: i’m already halfway there

stars: tobio is a good boyfriend i love him

he blocc: yes we know

stars: oOf he’s here !! goodbye i need to sleep for a week

he blocc: please sleep well

stars: will do !!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i said y’aint and my sister yelled at me it has damaged me emotionally


	19. unfortunately, not a chapter ):

hello, i come with somewhat disappointing news.

yknow how,,, two or so chapters ago? i mentioned being kurobas > haikyuu ??

well....i've lost almost all interest in haikyuu..so it seems i will not be able to continue this fic

which is okay, really. i had no plans--i was just winging it, lol.

so, consider this fic discontinued--which doesn't really matter because it's a texting fic anyway.

uhhh, thank you all for all of your support on this fic, and pcc, it was fun while it lasted :)


End file.
